The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)

This is German Expressionism in one of it's most stylistic horror forms. I really like the music too. It adds to the general creepiness.
The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari was directed by Fritz Lang, who also did Metropolis. Fritz Lang did some seriously amazing stuff. Especially when film cameras were so limiting. There are only so many tricks you could do back then, but he really set the bar HIGH when it comes to inventing some crazy stuff. Metropolis is a perfect example of that, so if you ever watch it on DVD, invest some time viewing the extra features.
Anywho, back to Dr. Caligari. Pay attention to the sets and props. Are you as visually excited as I am?? This film really drives me nuts because it's so eerie. Everything about it makes you wonder how someone imagined it and what goes on in Lang's mind, how he wants to present all this to you, the viewer. Makes you feel special, right?
Although I DO understand, this may not be for everyone. Give it some time. It could grow on you.

Note:
If you're still interested in learning more, you can branch off into your own silent film interests. There's a lot out there so be prepared to spend some major time researching. A good way to learn some more about film is reading auto/biographies about different directors (Fritz Lang would be good to start out with) and actors. Also, keep open to suggestions. Maybe look around to see if there are any specialized theaters if you live in a large city; there are places that only show art films, places that only show foreign films, etc. Look in video rental stores under "Cult Classics". Look in the dollar bin at the crappy gas station. Be diligent, you'll eventually find what you're looking for.

David Bowie

Obsessed. With. This. Song.
SO PERFECT.

Jack Hylton And His Orchestra: Happy Feet

A brief musical interlude. Feel free to quickstep or do the charleston at your leisure. At the very least, eat some Charleston chews!

Charlie Chaplin

To begin your introduction to silent film, start out with Charlie Chaplin. He is the most widely recognized, therefore, the most widely available. The problem with pretalkies is that they are VERY hard to find out in the wild; everyone these days wants mediocre drivel. Don't believe the hype that these films are boring, you just haven't found your silent soulmate yet. Charlie Chaplin is also a great pick for your silent viewing pleasure because he does shorts! So if sitting around watching a two hour and forty minute film where there is no audible dialogue is not your cup of tea, a 15-20 minute short shouldn't be a torture session. Plus, Charlie is entertaining and the cutest ever so building up your tolerance is enjoyable in the process.

Love of silent films comes naturally. Of course, Mr. Chaplin isn't for everyone. So if you aren't feeling him, don't despair! Try Buster Keaton. Although be careful about expressing your undying love for either of these silent comics, there are vehement loathers of one or the other. A divine feud, if you will, such as between Bette Davis and Joan Crawford fans (and the actresses themselves, supposedly).

This film clip comes from 1925's Gold Rush.

Phantom of the Opera (1925)

This was the first silent film I ever watched and it remains one of my favorites! Lon Chaney stars as the titular character, who is way cooler than that lame-ass Gerard Butler in the musical version. Gerard Butler just wore a mask that covered half his face and some putty to aid in the process of making him look ugly. Lon Chaney, on the other hand, actually did some weird things (according to what I've read) to himself to truly get into character. Supposedly for Phantom of the Opera, he wound a wire around his head to get his nose to go up like that. He was also very skilled in applying make-up which earned him the nickname of "The Man With a Thousand Faces." You can regularly catch this film on TCM (Sunday nights are silent nights!). And a little piece of trivia: Lon Chaney's son, Lon Chaney, Jr., went on to act in 1941's The Wolf Man.

Smashing Pumpkins

Look familiar?

A Trip to the Moon (1902)

After reading about this movie FOR YEARS, I can finally say that I watched it.
To learn more: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_trip_to_the_moon

Dream I: Vincent Gallo

Yeah, I know. Vincent Gallo. I have a crush on him because of his nose, don't judge. The dream follows a recurring theme for me: getting caught up doing mundane things while a guy gets irritated that I'm not paying attention to him.
So in this dream I'm standing outside a building waiting with a crowd of people and Vincent Gallo is one of them. We're both dressed like Marlene Dietrich.

For some reason, we start to quietly flirt with each other. We link arms and go inside the building; come to find out, we're there for a lecture on feminist literature. During the lecture, I'm randomly working on a painting with the canvas resting in my lap. Instead of painting with a brush, I'm using the head of a sewing pin.

While attempting to use such a small utensil to make pastel polka dots on my canvas, Vincent Gallo is giving me love letters in pink envelopes. After a while he gets irritated because I have about 3 or 4 envelopes and I haven't opened them yet, I'm holding them in one hand while continuing to paint with the other. Slightly hurt that I'm not reading his handwritten declarations of love, he grows quiet and to make up for it, I put my arts and crafts project away. He forgives me and we put our arms around each other, looking to the speaker of this particular lecture: Simone de Beauvoir is discussing Existential Feminism.

Hedy Lamarr

Hedy Lamarr is heartbreakingly beautiful and intelligent to boot. She is the brains behind the Lamarr-Antheil patent on frequency hopping which allows everyone to talk on their cell phones without someone listening in on the same line (party line, anyone?). Yeah, Hedy Lamarr made it possible for everyone to have the technological goodness of a cell phone. If you want to research her patent, google it, because there are drawings and tons of good stuff to read. And what totally seals the deal for me is this awesome quote of hers: "Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid." She has a mouth on her too.

McDonald's McRib

It's delicious. Funny story is I actually used to be a vegetarian .. for 5 1/2 years! I can't go into the story about what changed my mind because I actually don't know what triggered my return to eating meat. One day I wanted to eat a chicken caesar salad and a few months later I was happily ingesting veal stuffed pasta and medium cooked steak. Every now and then I enjoy a vegan or vegetarian themed meal but I am quite content in my flesh and blood revelry of dining on an animal's body. But, yes, I am now a devout follower of the delicious cult that is the McDonald's McRib.

I Like You: Hospitality Under the Influence

If you're looking for a fabulous read here is a wonderful tome: I Like You by Amy Sedaris. I don't care if you're anti-domesticity and all, just read this book. Take her $.25 earning tips into consideration (why isn't there a damn cent symbol key?!). I adore Amy Sedaris and all her wacky eccentricities. Her recipes are delicious too. Try the Greek Yogurt Noodle recipe (I don't remember the exact name). It sounds gross, but trust me on this one! I know food and this is good. Besides, if you're a guy: learn to cook. And wear a floral apron while in the kitchen. I think it's sexy (I'm being dead serious here).

Note: I'm copying the recipe from Amy Sedaris' book verbatim.

Yogurt Spa-ghetti

(Inspired by the book The Glorious Foods of Greece by Diane Kochilas)

5 large Vidalia onions, coarsely chopped to about the size of a postage stamp

6 tablespoons olive oil

1 pound spaghetti

2 cups Greek yogurt (thick)

1 cup coarsely grated sharp cheese, preferably Kefalotiri

1/2 cup roasted pine nuts

Fistful chopped parsley

Saute the onions in oil on medium to low heat for about a half hour, until onions are brown (caramelized). Leave them in the pan. Then boil spaghetti in salted water. Drain pasta, saving a half cup of pasta water. Mix yogurt and pasta water in a bowl, then add half the cheese and all the caramelized onions and roasted pine nuts. Toss all ingredients well. Top with remaining cheese and parsley.

Alfred Hitchcock's Vertigo

Watch this movie, it's creepy. What makes it so eerie is Jimmy Stewart's obsessive nature towards a girl, Kim Novak, and how he broods over her constantly. Yet it's genuine and sympathetic without being lame. Although I did take a particular liking to Midge, I didn't get to see enough of her as I wanted to. The score is haunting, Stewart's colorful nightmare half way through the film is graphically inspired, and the ending leaves you on edge thinking, "Did that really just happen?!" Make sure you see the newly restored, widescreen version. In case you want more Hitchcock, may I suggest Rear Window, Stage Fright, and Strangers on a Train for your viewing pleasure. These films are all best seen in the dark and by yourself.

Smith's Rosebud Salve

This stuff is amazing. Rosebud Salve is great because I'm not a big fan of a goo-like consistency plastered on my mouth, I don't want my lips to look like patent leather. I'm fine with a natural look, thankyouverymuch. This also has a pale pink color with a subtle scent of roses. The salve can double as a moisturizer for dry spots on hands or elbows. Good news: the tin lasts about a year for me. Smith's Rosebud Salve has started being sold in squeeze tubes too which is easy to carry around in a small purse (I refuse to buy into the suitcases girls pass off as handbags) or extra handy stashed in a pocket. Sephora stocks this instore and online http://sephora.com/browse/brand_hierarchy.jhtml?brandId=Rosebud or you can browse http://www.rosebudperfume.com/ to see all the other flavors. The original flavor shown up above is my favorite as I am now the proud consumer of a 4th tin and my 1st tube.

I'm baaack!

I couldn't stay away forever! Now that I finished watching the season finale of Mad Men, my life is temporarily over. Lucky for you, I have time to type out all my superior thoughts on stuff that people don't care about. Remember, bad taste is better than no taste at all.